Ladies and gentlemen, the Spear Hunting Museum is here to claim the title.
During our epic road trip across North America of 2016 and 2017, we traveled thousands and thousands of miles throughout the US. We discovered many places – some good, some crappy… but today, I present to you the most ‘Murican place I have ever come across. What makes it ‘Murican instead of simply ‘American’? It’s… complicated. If you think you’ve been to a more ‘Murican spot, however, tell me in the comments.
Enter the Spear Hunter himself – Gene (or Eugene) Morris. Born in Tennessee in 1933, Mr. Morris served in the Air Force for 22 years before retiring as a colonel. He killed his first deer with a spear at 40 years old, and from then until his death in 2011, his spears took a long list of animals both familiar and exotic: hundreds of alligators, over 150 boars, dozens of whitetails, 20 rams. Warthogs, blesbok (a South African antelope), a watusi (a type of cattle), ostriches, a waterbok (a large antelope), and a kudu (another type of antelope) round out his ‘African’ collection.
The museum shows his kills, documented and taxidermied – all five hundred plus – which led to his self-given accolade of ‘the Greatest Spear Hunter Ever’. Ahh, ‘Murica – where one’s contribution to the world can be measured so precisely, yet matter so little.
Peek at the gift shop if you like (it’s right by the entrance), but head down the other path to get started. On display here is a look at both the animals taken along with the spears used. Some black-and-white information panels are around, along with some stories in smaller text worth reading.
I’m far from an expert on taxidermy, but this looked pretty good.
I…. got nothing. It would seem the great spear hunter himself, despite being to Africa many times, has managed not to see some of the continent’s great, modern cities… Perhaps it’s easier to maintain one’s casual superiority when all you see are the animals you intend to kill.
Painting one animal on another animal’s hide? Suuuuurrre… I also don’t get why they only taxidermied the top half of the ostrich here…
A few more of his conquests. No idea why some of the heads are mounted while other animals were skinned.
A jawbone from a boar – because as we all know, spear hunting a boar and the military catching Saddam Hussein are inexorably linked. (Just in case the text is too small to read: “13 Dec ’03 Texas – 2 boars at the same time the day they caught Saddam”).
As usual, plenty of pictures to support the hunter’s side of the story. There’s little reason to doubt any of the kills here, of course.
One of the final areas before a small display of souvenirs and gifts.
Part of me left just a little horrified, to be frank. Making your entire life based on killing animals…? It’s one thing to have a singular passion for something, but this passion feels distinctively ‘Murican.
Name: Spear Hunting Museum
Address: 20216 Hwy 59, Summerdale, Alabama, 36580 (GPS: 30.519814, -87.707685)
Hours: 8:00am-5:00pm Monday-Friday (closed Saturdays and Sundays)
Admission: free (donations accepted)
Phone: +1 251-989-7700
Website: http://spearhuntingmuseum.com/
